Missing You At All

You know, after just 4 days away from Parker and Jaimie, I feel like I am missing out on the most important moments of his life. I know it is only a short period of time to be away from someone for only 4 days, but 4 days to a 10 week old is 5.7% of his entire life. That's a huge number. Am I obsessing? I think not.

Jaimie and Parker left Austin yesterday and are now in New Orleans, kicking it on Bourbon Street. Jealous? After a few Hurricans at Pat 'O's, I'm sure Parker will get in a fight with a tranny on some side street an end up sleeping it off in the New Orleans City Jail. Wait, I think I just fast forwarded 20 years. What is wrong with me? All I keep doing is aging him up.

I think it's the fear of missing something important. Right now everything he does is important. Everything is a major milestone. His first smile, the first time he holds his head up. His first time to chuckle... You don't want to miss any of these things because they are his first. I have to keep reminding myself there will be plenty of firsts. You have to decide what the important ones are and live for those. If every first is just as important as the next, then you spend the rest of your life and most of his being an embarrassing pain in the butt.

I've got 3 more days to go, some i'm going to suck it up and tell myself that if any "firsts" happen while I'm not there, then they must not have been any of the big ones. But it's hard, when his first plane ride, first trip to Austin, first trip to New Orleans, first time meeting his cousins and his aunt jody and his first time meeting some of our closest friends all happen on the same trip.